Encouraging Words For the Young Wife and Mother

"I agree, you do need to loose weight, you should try meth, it will give you lots of energy, to clean the house."

"Can you believe this guy, he got his wife's name tattooed on his arm, dumb. Everybody knows you don't do that, tattoos are forever, hoes are not."

"I like your look, it's like the Sultan's daughter. You should straighten your hair though, so it's smooth."

"You need cooking lessons"

"You can get a job at Walmart"

"You are not an artist, you should give up this pipe dream, you can get a job at Walmart or Mc Donalds, or anywhere."

"You don't really need to go to college, I can make us more money."

"Why do you need clothes or shoes?! I'm the one who works! Get a fucking job cunt and buy your own clothes and shoes"

"You should quit your job, they are making fun of you"

"You should quit your job, you don't make enough money there to make that job worth your time and you're not very good at it anyway."

"Maybe you can go to college after I finish going to college"

"I'm sorry I got your bank account closed but that banker was trying to swindle you out of money, I did not overdraw your bank account, he's a LIAR!"

"I'm sorry I wrecked the car your stupid fucking hillbilly/terrorist family gave me to get to work because I was high and had tunnel vision and pulled out in front of another car, broke the front axle, then refused to pay for the repairs and then left the car to rust in a field."

"You shouldn't go to that salon anymore, they are just making fun of you, they ruined your hair."

"You're family does not love you, let's move far away from them"

"Your mom is a Pink Hippo"

"Your family are all inbred retards"

"Your family are terrorists, no, greedy capitalists, no communists. I hate your family"

"If you ever leave me I will kill myself"

"If you don't forgive me I will kill myself"

"I'm going to kill myself!"

"I'm going to bash my brains in"

"You are making me cut myself"

"I'm punching myself in the eye and then going to tell everyone you did it because basically, you made me do it, so you are responsible"

"You are violent and psychologically abusive" (Really? I had never been exposed to violence before, especially not self-inflicted violence that is supposedly my fault)

"No, I won't hold the baby so you can clean but I will take pictures of the mess and keep them forever."

"You need to shut your fucking son up!"

"Sorry I punched a hole in your bedroom wall, daughter"

"I'm going to kill myself, your making me kill myself"

"You make me want to die, you can't EVER leave me, I've got a knife to my throat"

"I'm cutting myself because you are mean and don't do what I want you to."

"Sorry I pulled your hair out when we were arguing about my drug use and lack of involvement in family activities, dear.I'm too busy chatting online now, I don't want to go anywhere with my family right now, what's for dinner and I kinda need my laundry done"

"Sorry I kicked you in the stomach when you were pregnant."

"Would you be interested in a wife swap with a lesbian couple for one night? Oh well, I'll just leave you with one of them anyway, while I go fuck the other one"

"Ask your parents for money"

"Ask your parents for some money, please"

"You need to call your parents and ask for money"

"My sister has this really great investment opportunity, call your parents and ask them if they would loan us a few thousand dollars for it"

Letter to young wife's family after they witnessed him hair pulling during an argument: "Dear in laws, I'm very sorry about my behavior. I love your daughter very much and would never want to do anything to ruin my relationship with you, my family. We will work on our relationship and I can assure you, something like this will never happen again." (until I choke her neck and kick her pregnant stomach)

 "I did not really expect you to divorce me, I just wanted you to change!"

Tell me living with a person who self harms, cuts himself, hits his head on things, punches himself and tries to choke himself with an electrical cord is easy. Tell me you could stay sane living with a person who degrades you constantly, sometimes overtly and sometimes passively, who physically abuses you and lies to you about it, like it never happened. When other people became involved, he behaved normally and was somehow able to fool everyone into thinking I was the one with problems. After living like that, with that person for six years, of course I developed mental problems, who wouldn't? When you are constantly held as an emotional hostage and not allowed to have opinions contrary to his, not allowed to do anything without this person's consent and approval, you are told everything you know is wrong, everything you believe about yourself is stolen, and replaced with hatred and violence, of course you will develop problems, unless you are a trained mental health professional. My twenties were spent trapped in a sociopath's prison, trying to pretend I could have a normal family and be a good mom to my kids, while dealing with the insurmountable stress of living with this person. Even after moving on with my life and going to trauma resolution therapy, I still have problems feeling completely safe and secure, I'm hyper alert and overprotective of my children and never really am able to relax or feel at ease.